I don’t mean your failures.
You will have them, and you mustn’t let them get you down, but we’ll talk about that another day. Today, I’m talking about the many people you will encounter in the freelancing world who want (perhaps need) to extrapolate from their failures to assure you that you, too, will fail.
They’ll say they’re trying to help. Hell, some of them may be trying to help. But, built into every “It’s impossible to…” or “There are no good…” is one of two invisible statements:
- I couldn’t make it work, so you can’t either; or
- I’m way specialer than you, so don’t assume you can do what I did
I’ve already written about how your mileage may vary in virtually any situation, so this may seem redundant. But, this problem bears a special look because it’s not about the right or wrong way to accomplish something–it’s about a near-stranger encouraging you to give up before you get started.
A lot of new freelancers are uncertain already, so having their worst fears ratified by someone positioning himself or herself as an expert can be catastrophic.
Sometimes, these negative declarations aim to cut off a whole career path. If I had a dime for every time I’ve heard a working writer tell an aspiring writer that it’s “impossible” to break in….well, I’d have a heck of a lot of dimes, but it still wouldn’t be anywhere near as much money as I’ve made as a writer.
Other times, it’s a niche, or a freelancing platform, or that the aspiring freelancer is too old or too young or isn’t qualified because her index finger is longer than her ring finger, or…you can see where this is going.
Good Advice is Balanced, Which May Require Many Voices
Often, when these discussions arise in public forums, exactly the right thing happens.
For example, a newcomer will inquire about a particular freelancing platform. Someone will immediately respond that there are no good jobs on that platform, the clients are all cheapskates, and you probably won’t get paid anyway. A couple of other people will agree that they haven’t had good luck there, but in a more balanced way. A few others will say that it’s worked well for them, and mention their fields and niches.
In this way, the new freelancer gets a balanced view of the platform: it works for some, doesn’t work for others, here are some of the factors that seem to make it a good option or not–exactly the type of information a less experienced freelancer needs to make an informed decision.
One Bad Apple Can Sour Your Outlook – If You Let It
Unfortunately, it doesn’t always play out that way. Maybe the discussion takes place in private, or a semi-private setting, and only one person has the relevant experience. Maybe the conversation shifts to private messaging, or the person who made the initial over-the-top statement is a powerful persona in that forum (or just a bully who denigrates anyone who disagrees with him) and so others hesitate to speak up.
It’s your job (though arguably it shouldn’t be) to sift through this, take what’s valuable, and leave the rest on the floor. If you’ve been put off a career path or niche or site or client because of what one person said, and that one person isn’t a trusted adviser who was very specific about the reasons, you’re making a grave mistake. Listen, yes. Gather views and experiences. Do not ignore red flags.
Just remember that when a relative stranger makes a completely one-sided, impassioned argument about what you should do with your career–a decision that won’t impact him or her in any way–that is a red flag.
The whiners and complainers are lots more vocal than the happy people, too. Those who are content and confident don’t feel the need to go on and on about their situation. The people who don’t do well, for whatever reason, tend to natter on endlessly about why it couldn’t be their fault.